I recently made a video called "What Does Pain-Free Birth Feel Like?" and I uploaded it to YouTube. I received a comment that said, "Oh, so you are just not calling pain, pain?"
That really got my wheels turning because that is not at all what I mean. When I say pain-free, I mean it does not hurt. I don't want to cry out or scream. I don't wince or grimace. I am not thinking, "Ouch, this hurts so bad!" To me, pain-free means that it does not have sharp or shooting pains, there is not a dull ache, there are no throbbing or numb or painful sensations.
Am I also talking semantics? Sort of, but not in the way the commenter suggested. Pain is a construct of the mind. That means that our body sends signals to our brain with directives on how to register the sensations we are feeling. This is how God created us. If we touch a sharp object, a hot stove, or other dangers, our body warns us instantly to move away from that sensation. This is all very helpful when we are in real danger.
But what about when we are not in imminent danger? What about when we are experiencing new sensations and our body doesn't know what is going on, so it tells us that they are PAIN and we start to feel things that don't feel good? This happens more than we think. It doesn't just happen with birth. People who experience anxiety and panic attacks can feel sensations that feel like a heart attack! When we fear something, our mind often creates unpleasant feelings and sends signals to our brain that what we are feeling is pain, even if it is not dangerous or painful if fear is not in the picture. So how do we get past that? Well, for some women, their body doesn't send signals of pain, and they just don't feel unpleasant sensations in pregnancy. That is not to say that they are not experiencing a workout, squatting, standing, swaying, pressure, getting up and down from all fours, but those intense sensations are not being categorized by the brain as pain. For other women, especially those who have experienced a painful birth before, there is still something we can do.
When an unpleasant or painful signal arises, we can remain calm and relaxed and tell our body, this is okay, this is safe. I was created to do this. The female body was made to give birth, it is a normal biological process, and I don't need to resist it, fight it, or fear it. That alone can really relieve discomfort. But what if the sensations continue to register as pain?
Do we truly believe that Christ can take away our pain and sickness as He has promised in the Bible? Does His Atonement cover more than just sin as He told us it does? If we believe that, then we can call upon Jesus to remove the pain. We can cast it out and believe that it has no place in our experience.
As we lean into and embrace the feelings with curiosity and excitement, they can shift from tight, tense, excruciating sensations to strong pressure or opening sensations. My husband once got Charlie Horse cramps in both calves at the same time. He fell on the floor and was flopping around, yelling out in pain. I had just learned about pain-free birth, and I suggested he stay calm and relax as much as possible and not resist the feelings. Within a short amount of time, he said, "Oh, it is gone. It feels better." In the same way that the pain melted away for him, we can also experience a different feeling by relaxing and not fearing and fighting the "cramping" or the "pain".
The first time I tried a pain-free birth, pain would come, and I would just cast it out and relax, and it would go away. With my next birth, I only started to feel pain briefly, and I again would relax and stay calm, and it would melt away. With my last birth experience, when I had my twins, the sensations did not get to a point where I wanted to cry out or say "Ouch". Meaning, they did not hurt. The sensations never got to a level that I could describe as pain. They were intense pressure, like lunging, or running, or leg presses, but I don't describe any of those actions as painful. If they were painful, I would be concerned that something was wrong, and I would possibly consult a physical therapist.
Pain-free birth is not just wishful, hopeful, delusional mothers who have a high pain tolerance and lie to themselves and others that birth doesn't hurt. It REALLY doesn't hurt!
My next goal is to change my mind's signals to pleasure so that I can not only experience a pain-free birth but a birth that feels good!!!
What do you think? Can women really experience an unmedicated birth that doesn't hurt?
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